Last Laugh
by bigbadwolfie604
Summary: A quick story about the Dark Knight's Joker escaping Arkham. You can't spell Slaughter without Laughter.


**Last Laugh**

**Summary: A quick story about the ****Dark Knight's ****Joker escaping Arkham.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Batman or the ****Dark Knight ****movie.**

**No Flames/ Bad Reviews( If you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all)**

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"Hey freak. How's, that view?" Paul Lock mocked the inmate inside his new dwelling. He had been working with the "star" of Arkham for the last year and he still could have "fun" with him. The "Joker" ,as he liked to be called, merely smiled back with the top half of his face hidden in the shadow. Weird considering he had two scars at the ends of his lips that formed a crude, and evil, looking smile.

"Why, Mr. Lock it is so good to see you. By the way, I'm not a "freak," just mentally- how did the lawyer put it? Oh, yes! Ill. So enough about me, how is your family?" The Joker commented while occasionally licking his lips like that of a wolf spotting a lam. Lock was used to his mind games and merely snorted.

"Oh! Do you have my makeup?" He inquired as John set his food tray down next to him on the table. Luckily he wasn't the one who had to get the strait jacket off the lunatic.

"Yep." John said calmly as he patted his right pocket. "Right here. But, Mr. Arkham won't let you have it. You know the rules."

"You know," The Joker said as he watched in the shadows as his grim smile grew bigger. "You and me are a lot alike."

Now Paul Lock had heard and seen a lot of things in Arkham that had disgusted and disturbed him to the marrow of the bones. But to have this guy say that was not only weird but in some ways a challenge. Still, the Joker did give him the creeps even with him being in a strait jacket.

"You and me are nothing alike Joker." Paul said as the Joker laughed madly at him as if he'd told the funniest joke in the world. It only served to draw him closer into the cell

"Oh, yes we are. You are holding my makeup to get me upset, just like how I used to rip off the mafia with their own money." The Joker leaned a little closer after a short laugh to the point where the light just covered his eyes.

"You see. . . I am just a regular guy . . . like you. I'm just trying to survive . . . like you and if what I do hurts a few people . . . I just chalk it up as another day in Gotham. " The Joker licked his lips and leaned back into the shadows smirking.

"Whatever floats your boat their Joker." Lock said sarcastically as he turned his back to the inmate. He walked calmly out the door and slammed it shut. He heard some shuffling as he locked the door and made sure that all the keys were on the key ring. He tugged the retractable line key loop that was held all the keys to Arkham. He made his way down the hall to inspect the rest and then call it a night.

Suddenly, there came a shout. The Joker called through the window.

"Mr. Lock!" The Joker's loud yelling was enough to get Lock to jump in surprise. He had finally reached his boiling point. He rushed back to the cell and in a fury opened the door to see the Joker sitting on his bed smiling as though nothing had happened.

"What!" Paul yelled back to the insane man.

"I was wondering if I could please have my makeup back?" He asked with a lick of his lips in the most sincere voice that he could muster.

That was it. Paul had enough of this bullshit and in his anger punched the Joker hard across the face. This only got him laughing and Paul unloaded everything he had at the inmate.

After, he had finished beating the man, Paul stood up and made his way towards the exit. However, to his amazement he felt someone grab his keys. In a split second he felt the retractable line wrap around his throat and tighten cutting off the air.

Letting out a gasp of surprise he managed to see the Joker holding the keys with his strait jacket hanging around him with a wicked smile. The Joker licked his lips and had the same evil grin as he had as Lock entered the cell. The Joker had popped and relocated his shoulder to escape the strait jacket and used the time Paul had left the cell to do so!

"Do you know how I got my scars?" The Joker asked suddenly as he tightened the makeshift noose.

All that Paul could do was nod no. And for the first time in his whole life he felt a fear that chilled him down to the bones.

Well," The Joker started. "When I was but a little one. . . my parents used to own this big fishing boat. And one day they took me with them. Well, we get to this good fishing spot and they decide to let the ship drift a little. So they were both fishing in the back and I was way up in the front."

Paul looked on in horror as the madman started his story. The man was clearly off his rocker!

"Well, you see. . . I was teething at the time and I needed something to chew like any normal child." The Joker paused and licked his lips as if remembering the story." So . . . I see the anchor's rope and decided that it would do just fine. So I put in my mouth and chew. However, this big wave suddenly comes up and the anchor went overboard!"

Lock tried to break the hold of the line and found that the air was slowly leaving his lungs. Where was the guard? Why wasn't he their?!? Lock reached wildly for the rope and for his assailant's arms but found nothing

"Well, the rope was in my mouth and it shot from corner to corner. And as they say: The rest is history. " The Joker concluded as he gave a sudden jerk and finished off Lock. Letting the corpse go the Joker laughed at the success. However, there was one problem: the guard who was guarding the cell block.

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Peter Jacobs had been the Cell Block 9's guard for over fifteen years. It was the closet cell block to the exit and thus a prime place to escape. He had always been one of those who wanted tighter security around this but the higher ups though him and the door was enough.

"Help me!" A voice suddenly called from down the hall. "It's the Joker he's trying to escape!"

That was all he needed. He'd never approved of the Joker being in Arkham. He thought the lunatic should have gotten some type of punishment. But, having a fortune of stolen mafia money can give you the best lawyer in Gotham.

Peter rushed into the cell with his gun drawn and looked in horror at the dead body of Paul. On instinct alone he made his way to the man and checked for a pulse. Never did he see the door swing open quietly and from the shadow's appear the Joker with all his makeup on his face.

Suddenly, Peter realized that the inmate was missing and turned his head to the door. The Joker struck Peter across the head with the metal food tray and knocked the old security man down to the ground. The pistol flew from his hand and found its way under the bed.

Peter used the rush of adrenaline and launched himself at the Joker. He tackled the inmate and forced him against the wall. As the Clown Prince of Crime hit the wall with a thud the metal food tray slipped from his hand. The old guard held the insane man against the wall and let a few furious punches into the gut of the Joker.

The Joker slammed his elbow into the back of Peter and forced the guard off him. The Joker then punched the elderly guard across the face. Finally, the pain was to much for Peter and he stumbled back towards the bed. However, the Joker grasped the guard and tossed him across the room.

The guard loss his balance and crashed headfirst into the glass mirror that hung over the sink. Peter bounced off and fell flat on his back right next to Paul. Dead.

"Oh, dear me!" The Joker stated. "Don't you know that breaking a mirror is seven years bad luck?"

With that he madly laughed as he went to Paul's body and found what he was looking for. Picking up his makeup he quickly applied a thin coat.

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The monitors of Cell Block 9 flickered slightly in the well light guard room. The room was the center that was used to open the only door in and out of the cell block. The glass that looked into the was both sound and gun proof. However, on the other side of the door there was an long, open shelve that peered into the mini center. On the far side of the center was an door marked: Storage. However, that could only be accessed by only the head nurse, Paul Lock.

The buzz that rang attracted the guard sitting at the desk. Peering through the glass he could see a guard standing at the metal gate. The standard hat covered the man's face and made it impossible to tell who he was. The rent- a- cop scratched his head and was sure that Peter was still in there. Maybe he was new or something?

Making his way over to the other side of control panel and buzzed in the man. He then watched as he entered the hall. Wanting to make friends with the new kid he peered through the open shelve. However, just as he was to greet the man he stared into a chalk, white face and the pistol that was aimed into his forehead.

There was a loud bang. Then, silence.

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The Joker made his way to the storage passing the dead body of the rent- a- cop. Humming to himself he search the key ring for the right key. It wasn't long before he found what he was looking for.

With a turn of the key he entered the storage room and scanned for the near endless rows of box that held the inmates 'things.

Scanning, he muttered the numbers of each box he passed. After going down about half the row he stopped and took the new box down. 0801. His number. Opening the lid he peered inside and flamboyantly took out the purple suit.

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"Mr. Joker it's time for your medicine." Called the nurse as she entered the cell. It was not unusual to have a guard enter the cell first to check for shanks and other weapons and stay for those who were more violent like the Joker.

However, finding the guard missing from the control center was horrible enough. The fat boy was doing god knows what. The door may have been locked but it was still foolish and dangerous. What if an inmate were to figure a way out?

She entered the cramp cell and let out a piercing scream that riled up the inmates. All laughed as she ran out of the cell block in tears. After all, what could be worse then seeing two dead bodies with a drawn smile in red makeup?

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The Joker silently pushed open the gates of Arkham as the alarms roared from the mental institution. Never glancing back he trudged down the street with his usual smile.

And something told him that this time he was **really** going to paint the town red.

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**Loved the movie so here it is! This is a short, 1 chapter story. It was fun but long. Besides I need to work on my others. Well, hope you enjoyed! REVIEW PLEASE!!**

**Signed,**

**Big Bad**


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